Not doing is hard work.

Now that we are all stuck inside all the time, we can start to appreciate how much of our days are organized around relieving tension. In the old days, a couple weeks ago, when you started feeling uncomfortable or had some problems to work out, you could always avoid them by going somewhere. Keeping busy and doing things was a coping mechanism.

Are you feeling more sensitive right now? It might be because you cannot duck out of tricky situations as easily now.

Are you noticing more problems coming up? It might be because they were always unresolved but before it was easy to just go do something as soon as you noticed them on the horizon.

Are you easily triggered? It might be because you were really good at controlling your environment and interactions, and now you don't have that same level of control.

When you cannot go anywhere you are forced to work with things as they are. You'll probably lose it at some point, but you get to keep trying to figure this out. Take a look at your expectations, schedule beliefs, and to do's, do they have to look just like they used to?

Avoidance is a really accessible coping mechanism. When you have to stay put, you have to learn a new skill set. You have to learn how to be present, and that is hard work. 

What tastes better?

Imagine in front of you a shot glass and a pitcher, both filled with water. Maybe even do this experiment yourself.

Take one teaspoonful of salt and add it to the shot glass. What happens?

The water is cloudy and a lot of salt settles on the bottom and stays there.

Take one teaspoonful of salt and add it to the pitcher of water. What happens?

The water remains pretty clear, with a little cloudiness at the bottom and a little bit of salt remains on the bottom.

In which container will the salt completely dissolve more quickly? Obviously the pitcher.

Here is the real kicker, which water tastes better?

The shot glass of water tastes terrible. Gross. The pitcher of water tastes like regular water.

What's the point of this little exercise?

Our mind is the container through which we experience the world. When we are narrow-minded, or small-minded, our minds are very easily overwhelmed. That very same suffering, problem, or challenge, when met with an open mind is very easily dealt with and resolved.

What is a small mind? A mind that is rigid, fixated, agitated, tired, hungry, unfocused, restless.

What is a open mind? A mind that is understanding, tolerant, patient, resilient, kind, receptive, present, aware.

And here is the good news, we can train our minds to be more open. We can make it a daily practice to develop and embody this type of mind. We can also learn to recognize when we are being small minded, and we can learn to take those moments of recognition as reminders to practice.

What is the point of training your mind? You will enjoy your life more, and the suffering that you experience will not overwhelm you. Of course you will still experience pain and problems, but they won't taste nearly as bad.

What are you looking for?

We are all constantly moving, shifting position, adrift in a sea of change. We find ourselves chasing, over reaching, holding back, leaning a bit too far.

Amidst that dynamic play, what are you looking for?

Are you looking for the right position? Are you only looking at what others are doing? Do you find yourself taking a particular stance, drawing lines in the sand of with me or against me? What if no one validates your position, are you okay with that?

Your view is important. Not your views, not your opinions or ideas.  Your view, what you are looking for, your outlook. 

Your view allows you to navigate change, or to constantly be fighting it. Your view allows you to reconnect with your center, or to be strung out and off balance. Your view can create harmony and balance, or it can create division and discord. 

Your practice should continually try to refine and clarify your view. Really dig in, what are you looking for?  Have you found it? 

When you think you have found it, be brave enough to ask the next question- does this view assist me in navigating change and adversity, or do I find myself caught up in the storm?

The hard part.

The intention is easy.  The aspirations and prayers increase your enthusiasm.

The hard part is maintaining a joyful practice of generosity.
The hard part is sustaining vigilance without getting caught up in mundane concerns.
The hard part is working with all of the obstacles, problems and distractions that come up.

It's easy to want to set out for the far shore.  It's much harder to get there. 

This might be your chance.

Suffering.  Pain.  Death.  Fear.  Anxiety.  Problems.

Don't push them away.  Don't run.

Look deeply at what is presenting itself.  Sit with the irritation and pain.  Relax into it.  Don't hold onto it, but don't push it away.  Just look directly at it. 

This might be your chance.  This might be the moment you gain insight into the nature of the problem.  This might be your opportunity to change.  This might be the moment you experience freedom from whatever is manifesting. 

Don't waver. 

This might be your chance. 

Instant feedback.

I think everybody dislikes being busy and having too much on their plate. 

The one good thing about being busy is that it provides instant feedback.

When you're busy, it's easy to see what you prioritize.
When you're overworked, it's easy to see your main neurosis.
When you're tired, it's easy to see how you handle negative emotions.
When you have no time, it is easy to see what you yearn for.

If you had nothing to do with your day- no appointments, no interactions, no stress- you would have no feedback for your practice. 

It can be difficult dealing with the intensity of our lives, but we have the advantage of using that intensity as a catalyst for our practice.  We have the advantage of using our life, as it is right now, as a means of accomplishment. 

The best thing about past karma.

Most of the time we look at our karma as a burden.  We are conditioned by all of our past decisions, actions and experiences, and perhaps we look back and wish how things could be different.

The best thing about our karma is that it has brought us to where we are today.

All of that hardship, pain and misfortune has brought us here, now.
All of those problems, lessons and bad decisions have allowed us to stand here, awake, at this moment.
If we had done things differently, we wouldn't be who we are right now.  Maybe we would still be asleep.

Maybe we needed to learn something through all of that pain and hardship.
Maybe we needed to work through something.
Maybe what we have to share is hidden in that struggle.
Maybe the wisdom needed to truly benefit others had to be experienced directly. 

So today, everyday, is a grand juncture.  We are the total sum of our past decisions and actions, and what we do with that now determines what and who we will be in the future.

The choice is up to you.

I choose happiness.

I choose happiness.

But it's not that simple, is it?

Despite our best intentions, we have all these negative emotions to deal with.

Despite our best effort, we have all these bad habits that reinforce and influence our actions.

Even when we think we have all the information needed to make a good decision,
we suffer from short sighted vision and biased perception.

We really want to choose happiness, but we cannot do that until we clear our heads, learn to control our emotions and start to see more clearly.

Hooked.

ལེན་པ་
Tibetan: Lenpa
English: Grasping, clinging, fixation, hooked, to hold, to perpetuate

When we encounter a problem in our life- stress, anxiety, difficult situations or decisions- we think the problems themselves are the actual problem.  The problems are to blame for how we feel and how our day went.  You know, when something can go wrong it will go wrong.

And it does, all the time. 

But what if the problem wasn't the actual problem.  What if it was our fixation and grasping to the problem?  What if it was our habit of getting hooked and perpetuating the problem? 

Problems come and go all the time.  We can either fight them tooth and nail and let them continue to torment us and our sleep, or we can see them as reminders of why we need to continue our practice.

If we don't get hooked there is a chance we can work through them.  In that way problems offer us a chance at liberation. 

First flight.

Few of us have ever flown on our own, we have let others be the pilots of our life, carrying us to our destination.

When trying to take off for the first time, you may make some common mistakes.

You may try to put yourself in the right position, like the top of a cliff.
You may spend all your time trying to perfect your vehicle.
You may try to take off with the wind, hoping it sweeps you away.

The best way however, is to fly into the wind.

The path directly into the headwind, the source of most resistance, is the most likely for success.

Own it.

What are you?

Angry.
Tired.
Scared.
Stuck.
In pain.
Disappointed.
Suffering.
Unfulfilled.
Happy.
Content.
Anxious.
Sad.
Uncertain.
Sick.
Dying.

Good.  Own it.

Now you know where to start your practice.

Difficult to accept.

It's yours.

All of your problems, your negative emotions, your anger and frustration, your suffering and discontentment.  All of it, it's yours.

I know that is hard to accept, but if we can accept that they are ours, then we can also accept our responsibility.  We have a habit of shifting the blame, being the victim and not claiming any control.  The consequence is we are waiting for others to fix our situation, to pick us as the fortunate one and offer us reprieve.

But we have to pick ourselves, we have to take the responsibility.

This moment is the start of our practice.

The grind.

How much of the grind is a concept?

A fabricated obstacle, a perceived barrier, an unreachable endpoint.

How much of the grind is fixation?

On how much this is going to hurt, on how bad you are going to do, on your own position.

We often find ourselves in the grind.  It could be Monday.  It could be a deadline.  It could be your health.

The grind can be a lot of things, but what is it really?

How do you sit with irritation?

Irritation follows us like a shadow throughout the day.  Often we do not even know it is there, but it finds its way into our work, our relationships, our commute, our responsibilities and even our free time.  

A critical component of meditation is learning how to relate to irritation. 

Do you try to get away?
Switch your posture?
Shift your focus?
Reach for your phone?
Check your email?
Turn on the television?
Turn on some music?  Change the station?
Do you recognize it as being impermanent?
Do you take the opportunity to practice patience?
Or do you let it fester, growing into agitation and anger?
When you experience irritation, does it overwhelm you?

Irritation is a subtle level of aversion.  We don't really like what is playing out in our experience, it could be coming from outside of us or it could be in our own heads.  The result is a state of discontentment that we wish to avoid.

And this is a universal human experience.

It is why we like to be entertained, why we like to eat good food and why we like to build things and do things. 

We all want to avoid the suffering and discontentment of irritation.  We all long for an inner peace and fullness, contentment and happiness.

So how we relate to irritation is important, because we can either run away, let it grow into a monster, or we can use that irritation for growth and spiritual development.  We can learn to hijack our adversity and our problems, to use them as catalysts for change.

And we can start right now, right on our meditation seat.

When worlds collide.

Imagine your riding along, enjoying your day.  Up ahead you see a fine looking fellow who tosses his water bottle into the woods.  What to do?

In his world, there is no problem.  The results of his actions are too distant to comprehend and his cares are too few.

In your world the fires of anger have begun to burn.  How can someone act with such blatant disrespect and carelessness?

Who's problem is it?  How to proceed?  How do your resolve this collision of worlds?  Do you set out and attack, or perhaps employ some intergalactic diplomacy?

We imagine that the resolution to conflicts in our world are too remote, too distant and beyond ourselves.  Actually, they are right in front of us.  Everyday.

We need to learn how to connect to others in a genuine way.  Don't attack them from a superior position, approach them with respect and establish a common ground.

Draw out the implications of their actions, from their perspective, not yours.  Engage empathy.

When they accept the implications of their actions they come to embrace a larger scope.  They see a bigger picture, how they are connected and the power of their actions.  At some point they may come to a decisive experience in which they actually change their view and their behavior.

Ignoring the problem isn't compassionate.  And it's not skillful.
Solving the problem for them won't help, they haven't realized why it needs to be solved. 
Forcing your position on them will only incite anger in their world, no chance for change then.

So your only option is patience, empathy, connection, reason and respect.  From the position of a shared basis, change is possible.  Freedom and peace are possible.  It's not them against us, it's us against us.  

Middle Way between extremes

Can you rest between extremes?

Between
existence and non-existence,
eternalism and nihilism,
acceptance and rejection,
affirmation and denial,
real and unreal,
hope and fear,
right and wrong,
good and bad,
beginning and end,
something and nothing.

Where is the middle between
'I got it' and 'I don't have it',
'This is it' and 'this is not it',
'This is good' and 'this is bad',
'Yes' and 'No'.

The Buddha taught that any fixed position that we take is the result of ignorance and the cause of future suffering.  Whenever you establish a ground, you are forced to defend that ground.  The need to defend yourself, your views, identity, culture, lifestyle; your very existence- creates a lot of problems.  The short list is fear, uncertainty, doubt and guilt; on the flip side arrogance, anger, power, manipulation and exploitation.

The middle way between extremes is the practice of groundlessness.  You could compare it to learning how to surf or float on water.  At first it might seem impossible, but with practice you discover that groundlessness can effortlessly carry much more weight and without all of the friction and stress of having a ground. 







 

The difficult part.

The difficult part of having a spiritual practice is not the practice itself; that is a joy and a blessing.  The hard part is figuring out how to included everything else, how to integrate the practice with the rest of your life.

The hard part is not trying to exclude resistance, problems, pain and defeat from your practice.

In order to overcome the hard part, you need an example; fortunately or unfortunately, you need to be that example.  To be the example, you'll need a strong practice; one that allows you to bring all negative situations and problems onto your path.

To be the example, you will need to master your practice.