No one is watching.

Our culture is largely centered on doing things for show. You record yourself working out, practicing your art, going through the motions. We are constantly broadcasting who we are to the world, marketing the best version of ourself to others. 

How do you practice when no one is watching? 

What are your actions when no one is there to hold you accountable?

How you show up in the world when no one is watching is most likely your most generous act, but it can also provide us with an opportunity to be our most selfish. It's up to you. 

Idolatry.

The Dharma was taught to make our minds more flexible, to liberate ourselves from selfishness and bad habits, and to allow us to be of service to others.

Our practice of the Dharma must be free from concerns of gain, praise, status or position. Correctly practicing the Dharma means that you do what you say, that you strive to live according to the teachings. Your actions, practice and lifestyle are emphasized, not your words, ideas or opinions.

When we start searching out positions, contriving situations for recognition, or using the Dharma to serve ourselves, our practice has missed its mark and becomes a source of bondage.

If we wrap the Dharma around our self, our mistaken practice becomes the source of idolatry. 

The slippery slope of self-compassion.

We are familiar with the practice of compassion, but what does self-compassion look like?

Self-compassion is the act of giving yourself space.  Space to breath, space to experience strong emotions, space to fail.  It looks like tenderness and humility.  It means not taking yourself so damn seriously. 

But self-compassion is a slippery slope.

Are we being tender and humble, or are we closing down and protecting our self?  Are we giving ourselves space to work, or are we not engaging for fear of failure?  Are we allowing ourselves to be wrong and to not beat ourselves up about it, or are we caught up in how right we really are? 

Truly the greatest act of self-compassion that we can enact is to cut through the root of self-grasping.  That is a bold act, and one that is simultaneously compassionate for oneself and others. 

That is compassion as it abides and manifests. 

Mara.

བདུད་
Tibetan: dud
English: Mara or demon

The story of the Buddha's quest for complete awakening and fulfillment reaches its climax under the Bodhi tree. It is here that Siddhartha Gautama formed a firm resolve not to get up from his seat until he was enlightened.

When Siddhartha took his seat and entered into meditative absorption he entered into battle with Mara, who was trying to prevent and derail his quest.  Mythologically, Mara is a powerful demonic god, but metaphorically anything that exerts a negative influence and creates obstacles and problems on our spiritual path is considered a demon, or Mara. 

As a practitioner, Mara symbolizes our own self-cherishing and our preoccupation with the eight worldly concerns.  These are what we enter into battle with on our own path.  As these powerful armies rise up against us, we must sit firmly and not waver in our practice.  We must remain unhooked by these clever and mischievous demons.

We get hooked by hoping for pleasure and fearing pain.
Our minds ensnared by hoping for fame and fearing disgrace.
We become trapped hoping for praise and fearing criticism and blame.
We are totally caught up in hoping for gain and fearing loss.

All of these are the self-cherishing habit of ego, caught up in hope and fear, attachment and aversion.  These are what keep us stuck in the cycle of samsara. 

Waking up from ignorance and delusion isn't easy.  The path isn't easy.  At some point you need to turn and face your fear.  You need to learn how to work with these demons, see how they hook us.  We need to understand how they how they shade our perception and influence our decisions and actions.

These demons are not real.  They are intense, but they are not real.  Knowing that we can start to work with them. 

Stop!

Stop looking for approval.  Stop waiting for affirmation.  Stop listening for consent.  Stop looking for signs of success.  Stop waiting for others to grant you accomplishment.

Your selfish concerns benefit no one, not even you.

Don't wait for permission.

Rely on initiative and generosity to secure the benefit of others.

Rely on your practice to secure your own benefit.

You know what you need to do.

Myth.

There is a certain myth that some people are susceptible to regarding their own practice.  It tends to draw people in, hooks them, ushers them along so they keep going. 

It is the myth that your practice will make you a better person.  The myth that you will be redeemed, made to be of value.  It is the myth of the conceivable but not the reality, the fanciful stories we tell ourselves about who we could be as we regale ourselves with stories of immortality.  Many follow that myth for years, working to be better, to fit reality with their vision, to be more happy.  Really they are working to cover up the self-judgement and contempt that pervades our life.

The myth lives on in a self-centered practice.  You are the practice, and the fruition you seek is a more complete you.  But you can't win, because from the very beginning you have created a chasm that cannot be crossed and every misstep confirms your failure.   

The practice you need is the one that makes you human.  The one that enables you to walk with pain, to sit with uncertainty and to dance with fear.  Practice so that you might be more kind to others, that you might extend your hand because you are able.

Let the fairy tale fall apart.  Let the masquerade come to an end.  The myth may have brought you here, but you don't need to keep believing it.

A true practice opens your heart and your mind, and you can experience that to be true.    

The mark of ignorance.

What does ignorance look like?

Is it rigid beliefs or definitions?
Is it incorrect information?
Is it hollow assertions?  Conflated ideas?
Grossly biased perceptions?
Is it the emotionally overwhelmed?
A narrow world view?

The mark of ignorance is selfishness.

It's opposite is compassion, empathy.  It's opposite is to care.

In this way we all suffer from ignorance.  We should strive to recognize it in ourselves and work even harder to bring about its opposite. 

We should strive to care.  

Loneliness, or Love?

Look deeply at loneliness.
Cut away all the selfishness,
the self concern and speculation.
When you get down deep,
deep into loneliness,

You find love.
An unbridled, boundless love.

Your heart aches because it wants to be shared.
It aches because you are holding it back.

Opportunity is everywhere.

We all fall.

We all fall sometimes.

It happens in different ways.  It is almost always unexpected and out of the blue.

When we fall, we know it.  It hurts, we look like a fool and we put in the effort to get back up.

But what does falling look like?

You've fallen when your mind is filled with anxiety and worry, when you are feeling insecure and self-conscious.

You've fallen when fear and apprehension dictate your course, when you feel unsettled.

You've fallen when you are selfish and rude, when your words are sharp and cut at people's hearts.

You fallen when you act with an air of indifference, concerned with only your own comfort and needs.

You've fallen when you fume with anger and jealousy gnaws at your heart, when you mind is caught up in strong wants and mistaken needs.

If you don't listen, don't give a damn and can't stop talking about yourself, you've fallen.

So get up.

Things don't need to be this way, there is a path out of this.  This isn't permanent.  But you have to recognize that you have fallen.

It is ordinary to fall.  It is the extraordinary that can maintain their composure and get back up.

We need you to get up.