The thing Buddhism gets right.

 Much can be said about the Buddha's teachings, about the importance of meditation, wisdom, compassion, how we are all interconnected. Of course, many other spiritual traditions share these same attributes. Here is what Buddhism really gets right:

The focus of the practice is on our own mind. 

This practice is going to take awhile. 

You are not to jump right to benefitting others and compassionate activity. You should not get lost in working in projects outside yourself. Bring the focus inside, learn to recognize your own needs, your own wounds, your own limitations. 

As you learn to open your own mind, to heal your own heart, you naturally become more open and available to others. 

You can't shortcut this step. There is no escaping this requirement, if you try to avoid it then it will always be a limiting factor in your life. 

You are the limit, and the throttle. 

Model of conscious leadership.

As a dharma practitioner on the path we can often times struggle to integrate our meditation with our daily life. Training in mind and awareness cultivates a state of preparedness and responsiveness on the cushion that we slowly learn how to bring out into our daily activities. As we learn to work with this sense of preparedness, we need to learn how to live authentically and contribute meaningfully to the world around us. 

The five elements of conscious leadership create a framework to integrate your practice with your daily life. By working with each of these elements you encounter resistance and limits in your own body, mind and emotions. Pay attention to that resistance and hesitation. As you become familiar with each of these elements, you will see where you are grasping to aspects of your experience or shutting down. Acknowledging these obstacles and perceived barriers gives you something tangible to work with in your meditation. In this way, our meditation supports our daily life and our daily activities fuel our meditation.

The result of a practice that integrates both meditation and your daily life is a willingness to have an grounded, fluid and truthful connection with the world around us. We awaken to the very presence that dwells in the heart of the human condition. All of these elements are included within the single sphere of unborn bodhicitta, our ever-present primordial state of authentic presence that is open, available and responsive. 

What tastes better?

Imagine in front of you a shot glass and a pitcher, both filled with water. Maybe even do this experiment yourself.

Take one teaspoonful of salt and add it to the shot glass. What happens?

The water is cloudy and a lot of salt settles on the bottom and stays there.

Take one teaspoonful of salt and add it to the pitcher of water. What happens?

The water remains pretty clear, with a little cloudiness at the bottom and a little bit of salt remains on the bottom.

In which container will the salt completely dissolve more quickly? Obviously the pitcher.

Here is the real kicker, which water tastes better?

The shot glass of water tastes terrible. Gross. The pitcher of water tastes like regular water.

What's the point of this little exercise?

Our mind is the container through which we experience the world. When we are narrow-minded, or small-minded, our minds are very easily overwhelmed. That very same suffering, problem, or challenge, when met with an open mind is very easily dealt with and resolved.

What is a small mind? A mind that is rigid, fixated, agitated, tired, hungry, unfocused, restless.

What is a open mind? A mind that is understanding, tolerant, patient, resilient, kind, receptive, present, aware.

And here is the good news, we can train our minds to be more open. We can make it a daily practice to develop and embody this type of mind. We can also learn to recognize when we are being small minded, and we can learn to take those moments of recognition as reminders to practice.

What is the point of training your mind? You will enjoy your life more, and the suffering that you experience will not overwhelm you. Of course you will still experience pain and problems, but they won't taste nearly as bad.

Compassion, redefined.

I have spent a lot of time leading meditation workshops and discussions about compassion. Most people tend to focus on the action of compassion. Compassion means helping the homeless, feeding the hungry, tending to the sick. Compassion means doing. If you take the action out, then somehow compassion seems to fall away.

This type of compassion is results focused. It needs to demonstrate an impact. No impact, no meaning.

The Buddha taught this type of compassion as 'normal' compassion. This is the type of compassion that we have for our friends and family, and even to strangers in times of crisis or shared humanity. We see this type of compassion in certain mammals, this natural instinct to take care and nurture our loved ones for our own welfare and survival.

When we are trying to cultivate compassion in meditation, we are trying to cultivate unconditional compassion. This is compassion that is objectless and unbiased. For this type of unconditional compassion, we need a new definition of compassion.

Unconditional compassion is open, available and responsive.

It is open- receptive, accommodating, vulnerable.
It is available- present, alert, attentive.
It is responsive- dynamic, engaged, attuned.

Unconditional compassion is focused on being, not doing. Being open, available and responsive, we can offer others our attention and understanding, we can acknowledge the pain and suffering they are going through, we can stay with them through struggle and strife. Embodying this unconditional compassion, we can offer others our warmth, kindness and generosity, or we can simply be present, listen, and witness.

"I see you" and "I hear you" can be more powerful than offering a solution. Compassion doesn't always need to have an answer, we don't always need to provide a fix. Sometimes offering others dignity and understanding are enough.

We can learn to rest in a state of openness, availability and responsiveness. We can learn to rest in unbiased equanimity, allowing ourselves to witness our own pain and the suffering of others. We can learn to be patient with adversity and ugliness, to witness rather than react, to embrace rather than reject.

And we can learn to carry this openness, availability and responsiveness off the cushion. We can carry it into our homes, our communities and into the world. We can walk with openness, be present and available in the world, and respond and engage with the way things are.

The foundation of compassion.

Compassion requires that we are present, that we remain open and responsive to others and the situations that we find ourselves in. A compassionate mind is engaged, connected and available. A compassionate heart hears, acknowledges and understands.

All of us have some measure of compassion. Often that circle is small and narrow, but we can train ourselves to develop great compassion. We can train in generating a mind that has compassion for all beings, everywhere, regardless of their circumstances.

The foundation for generating great compassion is self-awareness. If we can't be open and non-judgemental with ourselves, how can we remain open and present with others.

Self-awareness is a lens through which we see our own mind, thoughts, emotions, fears and neurosis. Self-awareness knows our present state. As we engage in meditation and strengthen our mindfulness and vigilant awareness, we start to see and appreciate the various levels of the self. We start to gain more agility in dealing with strong negative emotions and thoughts. Mindfulness and vigilant awareness deepen our self-awareness, which allows us to be more open and perceptive to who we are and who we are not.

As we train in compassion, we are really training in how to remain present, open and responsive. If we find ourselves shutting down, turning away or tuning out, then our practice of being compassionate has slipped into the mire of self-focus and our own agenda. Self-awareness allows us to assess and manage that process of shutting down and turning away, it allows us to see what we are averse to and to try to let go of our fixation.

A simple practice to work with this practice of self-awareness and compassion is tonglen, or giving and accepting. In this practice, we can see where we start to shut down to others pain and suffering. We can see what kind of situations we tend to turn away from. It might be easy to practice tonglen with a loved one in mind, but it might be very difficult when that person is a homeless man or someone who causes you a lot of trouble. It might also be easy if someone is suffering from certain mundane problems, but very difficult if that person has a debilitating cancer or illness.

Where do you start to shut down in your practice? In your daily life? Use the power of self-awareness to catch yourself as you start to tune out and turn away.

The practice of compassion extremely powerful and includes all aspects of the path. Everything is connected, and so are we.

Unique Dzogchen Mindfulness and Vigilance

Everyone is familiar with mindfulness. Mindfulness is often described as focus or attention directed towards a particular object. We can be mindful of our breath, mindful of the way we walk or our daily activities, like washing the dishes. In this sense, mindfulness is synonymous with attention or focus.

Jon Kabat-Zinn defines mindfulness as paying attention on purpose, in the present and without judgment. That is a useful definition, but again here the indirect meaning is that we are paying attention to some thing.

In Dzogchen we also employ mindfulness, but in Dzogchen there is no object of focus. The practice of Dzogchen is said to be without support. 

How do we be mindful, but not mindful of any thing?

We can define mindfulness in the Dzogchen tradition as an uncontrived, open presence free from judgment.

It is uncontrived because we are not directing our attention towards anything in particular and we are not trying to make anything happen. It is open presence because we are alert and aware, here and now. It is without judgment because we are not concerned with the contents of what is arising in our experience, whether it is good or bad, painful or pleasurable.

We simply rest in uncontrived, open presence free from judgment.

At first this takes a lot of effort. The habitual instincts of our mind is to be engrossed and fixate on our experience. We chase after sights and sounds. We follow trails of thought and get caught up in a web of stories. Our attention picks out objects, clings to them and gets caught up in distraction. This is where vigilance comes into play.

Vigilance is a clear, alert peripheral awareness that guards our meditation. Vigilance can be both extrospective and introspective awareness. We are aware of various appearances to our senses, but we also clearly see the array of thoughts and emotions coming up in our internal experience. In this way, vigilance is like a transparent looking glass, it sees everything but doesn't react to it. It is mindfulness which does the fine tuning, when it is necessary.

Vigilance notices when our attention has strayed towards an object or appearance. Noting that we have strayed, we use mindfulness to again rest in the uncontrived, natural state. As we train ourselves to rest in the natural state, the wandering of attention becomes less and less, eventually giving way to effortless mindfulness.

In effortless mindfulness, the strength of vigilance becomes further intensified and more powerful. It is like a sharp razor that cuts through appearances in all their variety. As we continue our training, eventually effortless mindfulness gives way to baseless mindfulness and the actual path of Dzogchen.

An open door.

The greatest gift that we can often give others is to simply be present and to listen.  We don't need to fix, provide solutions, or rush in with all of our own energy. Simply witness, understand, and remain open to whatever is coming up.  

When we can truly listen, without judgement or bias, without shutting down or turning away, then we can truly be of benefit. We can hear what they need, and they might feel comfortable enough tell you.

The door is always open.   

Unconditional love.

We are all familiar with love.  We love our family and close friends.  We would do anything to help them.  We take joy in their success, we suffer in their pain and loss. 

We don't often think of this love as conditional.  If we were asked, we would most likely say that it is unconditional love. 

We love them when they make mistakes, or lose their temper.  We give them the benefit of the doubt.  We cut them some slack.  Regardless of the conditions, our love for them endures. 

But this type of love is also really conditional love.  They are those close to us, those in our inner circle.  They are those that we rely heavily upon and who give us support and comfort.  Those are the conditions of our unconditional love. 

But what does unconditional love really look like?

It is never forsaking anyone from your heart.

It is a mind that never gives up hope, is willing to give them another chance.  It is allowing mistakes and imperfections.  Cutting people some slack, giving them the benefit of the doubt.

People are going to do bad things to us.  They are going to deceive us, act out, cause us grief.  But we never close the door.  We never say we are done.  It's never over.

Keep the door ajar.  You don't need to invite them back in, let them come on their own terms.  But keep the door ajar.

By not forsaking others, we give them a chance.  We keep the aspiration that they find happiness and be free from suffering.  We continue to show up, regardless of the conditions. 

Bigger than that.

Be bigger than what you are going through.

You can accommodate this situation you find yourself in.  You can remain open to it.  You are able to listen, to bear its weight.  You can stand the gravity of these conditions.

If your mind cannot be bigger than the situation you will be crushed and overwhelmed.  It will be too much.  You won't be able to tolerate what you are going through.  You won't accept it and won't be willing to participate.  I can't get involved, I can't do this. 

This is easy to judge for yourself.  Just look at your mind, your reaction.  Look at how you respond.

The way to a bigger mind is compassion.  It starts with your concern being bigger than yourself.  Broaden your horizon.

The end is an open, expansive mind that is able to accommodate anything, like space.  Overwhelm situations through complete and utter openness, and everything is carried as the path. 

Not there yet.

Your practice will have certain goals and endpoints.  There are going to be practices that you accomplish.  You will finish some things.

But the defining characteristic of an authentic practice is that you are never done.

Never a time to hang up your shoes.
Never a time to retire for good.
Never a time to say that's it.
You will never arrive at the destination.  

Your practice will always require you to find a delicate balance between being overwhelmed by conditions or withdrawing your presence.  The more our minds grasp to situations the more we get sucked in and eventually overwhelmed.  On the other hand, without compassion and the intention to benefit others, we will often find ourselves being stagnant and withdrawn.

The balance is difficult to find. It is enjoying peace and fulfillment, but always standing up and moving forward.  It is being open and responsive, yet calm and stable.

Open and responsive.  Calm and stable.  Those you can identify in your meditation.  Those you can carry forward into the world.   

The power of bodhicitta.

Being clear, it gives us direction.
Being stable, it manifests in various ways.
Being expansive, it is present.
Being formless, it gives shape to our life.
Benefiting many, it fulfills our aims.
Benefiting oneself, it accomplishes the aims of others.

Only so much room.

We all have our commitments that we have to honor and respect. 

We have jobs, families, friends.  We have to keep appointments and stay on top of our responsibilities.  We have bills and errands, workouts and walks in the park, babysitter's schedules and client timelines.  Of course we have email, Facebook, news and books.  And our practice (doesn't that come first;).    

We only have so much room in our day.  Only so much time we can actually give.

A part of my practice of compassion is the intention to be open and available at all times.  To be present, to give someone that space when they need it.

I fail all the time.  I'm failing now.

And that's the choice that we make over and over again.  Do we actually be present, open and available; or do we play out our own agenda, our own thoughts, our own story and interests.

We only have so much room, but we also decide where its walls are and who we let in. 

How do we knock down the walls?

The practice of compassion.

What do you think about when someone says to practice compassion?

Do you think about helping someone.  Lending a hand.  Tending to the suffering, feeding the hungry.  Do you think about a mother caring for her child.  A father picking up their child from an accident.

We tend to think of the practice of compassion as an act.

But what if the practice of compassion was to be open, available and responsive?  What if the act of compassion was to remain open, available and responsive?

The practice isn't about doing, it is about being.

Being open, available and responsive- you could help someone, lend a hand, tend to their suffering, feed them when they are hungry.

You could also simply maintain that space for them.  Be there, with them, not doing anything.  And not needing to.

The struggling artist.

An artist is someone who is generous, open and vulnerable.  Their medium is connection.  The result of their work is that they have impacted another life, brought about a benefit or change.

We all have to work with what is coming up.  Something is always coming up.

The artist is able to cut through the resistance and willing to care enough to make an impact.

The rest of us get caught up in the resistance, entangled in struggle and strife, dissatisfied in our search for meaning. 

We're struggling artists.

The difference?  How you relate to what is coming up in your life. 

What do we do when anger shows up?

Anger shows up at a party and starts causing division and tension.  What do we do with anger?

Do we act as a passive bystander?  Maybe if we pretend this isn't happening it will go away.  At the very least this isn't my fault so I am not going to get involved.

Do we rally the troops, barge in and meet anger with anger?  Let's see who wins.  Probably no one.

Not passive, not aggressive.  What others options do we have?

We can practice fierce compassion, which looks like openness and doing the emotional labor of advocating for what is right.

Being open means being fierce, because it is definitely easier to sit in back and not get involved.  Being open also means being willing to listen without bias or judgement, of being able to drop your assumptions and perception in favor of seeing clearly.

Doing emotional labor means doing the hard work of being patient and respectful, acting with kindness and most of all, not shutting down when fear shows up. 

None of this is easy, but it is important.  This is why we have our practice, because we need to learn how to work with our own anger and aggression.  We need to learn how to actually be open and not shut down in the face of fear and uncertainty.

This starts with you, but it affects everyone. 

#DoNoHarm

Doubt.

Doubt is a mischievous little thing.  It sneaks up on you unknowingly.  It lurks in the shadows of your mind, waiting for an opportunity to spring up and occupy your mind.

In a way, doubt protects us.  It prevents us from being taken advantage of, from being fooled, again.  It is an intellectual and emotional survival mechanism.  I won't let myself be hurt.  I won't over commit. 

I still hold the reins.

But doubt also holds us back.  What are we holding onto?  We are holding onto our hearts and minds.  We cannot tolerate being that vulnerable, open.  If we really put ourselves out there, we are so susceptible to being hurt, being let down.

So we hold on.

We hold on and we don't let go.  We look for the slightest misstep.  We pounce on every incorrect utterance.  "Aha!  I was right all along."

You should not blindly trust people and be susceptible to their every whim and preoccupation.  But with your own experience as your guide, with reason and logic as your weight, and with confidence as the full measure, it may be time to be willing to be open and vulnerable.  It may be time to trust.  It may also be time to doubt whatever you used to be holding onto. 

Doubt the need to always protect yourself.  Open your heart and mind to others, and you might be surprised what comes back to you in return.

Postscript: Awaiting your fate.

As a postscript while you wait,

Does it matter?

If you are going to live to see another day, how will you spend it?
If you are not and your time has come, what now?

Your freedom from the confines of your fate only comes right now.  There is no other time to be free.  The cycle is perpetuated right now, while you wait.  My own fear, doubt and uncertainty perpetuate the cycle.

Whether you have much time or little is not the point, the point is to be free as it arises.

Liberation upon arising means that you are not overcome by your fate, nor overcome by the world.  You take it as it comes- the good, the bad and the ugly.

Let it be, as it is.  

Open.  Unwavering.  Fearless.