The result of the work.

If our work is to be more present and of service in the world, then we need to change the way we think about the results of our work. We need to change the way we think about accomplishment and achievement for the type of work we are doing- the work of showing up, being present and attentive, striving for human dignity and kindness. The usual measures of success, recognition, promotion, and profits aren't the goals for this type of work, and what our culture sets as the targets of work well done is only going to leave us disappointed and frustrated. 

During the course of a lifelong commitment to this practice, you will realize that there are no shortcuts and that this work that we are doing is hard work. It is difficult to be of service without being destroyed in the act of service. It is challenging to deal with difficult people and maintain our patience and willingness to care. Learning to show up consistently, despite failure, fatigue and conflicting emotions is hard work. 

As we learn the necessary skills and attitudes needed on the path, we start to achieve a sense of being in the world and out of the world, involved in the messiness of life and yet not caught up in the unnecessary struggle. 

We start to learn that we can survive our intense emotional ups and downs, that the day to day is much like the weather, some days are good and some are bad and yet each day we show up and dedicate ourselves to our practice. 

We start to recognize that some things are simply out of our control, that we can strive to be present, compassionate and kind, and that sometimes that is not going to land quite the way we thought it would. 

We start to understand that though we struggle with the meaning and significance of our life, we find there is purpose and benefit to holding something- holding space, holding intention, holding to a daily practice. 

As you endeavor in your practice, over time, you will likely find that the tangible benefits of your practice are hard to identify or remain elusive. However, you will also likely find that the intangible benefits of your practice have led to a profound transformation of your being and identity, bringing a felt sense of joy, ease, and connection. This accomplishment as a result of your practice and hard work transform the world from a battlefield in which you are always struggling into a world in which you always feel at home. 

At home in the world, dedicated to presence, openness and availability, kindness and compassion, committed to showing up for ourselves and for others with a felt sense of joy, ease, and connection, those are some of the ways in which the results of our hard work show up in our life. The accomplishment of the practice is largely a life well lived, the result is the practice itself with nothing more to achieve. 

Forging the trail.

We can give people our respect. We can show them unconditional love and kindness. We can be patient and understanding. We can be generous and lend them a hand. We can give them a break, offer them a second chance and let them start over.

Others deserve this. It's something that we can give.

But it's often not enough. Ultimately, it's not something we can give.

You must do the work, the inner work of recognizing your own self-worth and potential. You need to do it for yourself.

You have to do the hard labor of stopping, looking within and resolving the tension in your own heart and mind. You need to look through your own self-deception and confusion.

Others can help us on this journey. They can point the way, offer support and guidance. But we must do the work ourselves.

We must forge the trail through the landscape of our lives.

Confusion and dishonesty.

Bad habits.  Poor choices.  Careless deeds. 

Confusion permeates so much of what we think, say and do.  We often find ourselves acting out of impulse, our behavior not driven by intention as much as it is driven by what we did yesterday and the day before. 

Amidst all of this confusion we find moments when discerning wisdom dawns.  We have moments when we can see clearly.  There are times we find ourselves in a gap between the clouds.  We are able to see our shortcomings, see where we have strayed, see what we could have done better. 

There are moments when the truth reveals itself.

In that moment, we have an opportunity to be honest with ourselves.  We have a moment of clarity to reflect, to examine and to change.  Our own discerning wisdom creates a gap in which we can leave behind confused habit patterns and neurotic behavior.

But often in that moment we lie to ourselves.

We shift the blame.  We minimize the damage to our self-image.  We protect ourselves from failure, from being wrong.  We do our best to avoid the irritation of whatever our wisdom is revealing to us.

We preserve our dignity out of dishonesty.  And the wheel of confusion turns...

Remarkable.

I saw something remarkable the other day.

I was walking in downtown Seattle this past week and saw a homeless man up ahead begging for change.  He was holding a sign, “Out of work.  Anything helps.”  In the winter Seattle’s homeless population spikes as people migrate to the coasts for warmer weather.  We are used to seeing men and women standing at off ramps, at street corners and camping out in archways to stay out of the rain. 

The man walking ahead of me approached the homeless man and gave him some change from his pocket.  Then he shook his hand.

He didn’t have to shake his hand.  He could have gave him money and walked away untouched.  He could have avoided getting dirty or having to worry about what germs the homeless man carried.   He could have made the exchange a simple, clean transaction. 

But he didn’t.

He made it human.  He extended his money, which I am sure the homeless man appreciated.  Then he extended his respect, kindness and dignity, something that is invaluable to someone who doesn’t feel like they are worth anything. 

We have a tendency to think big.  We think in systems and projects and data and financials.  All of that is important if we want to fulfill our aims and the aims of others, we need to go through that process, but if you are wondering where to start, start here.  Start with extending kindness, respect and dignity to those in your family and your community.  Start with our real world problems, with where we are right now.

It might be dirty and you are going to have to work hard, but if you are able to impact a human life, you are doing something remarkable.     

Discipline

Let's be honest, none of us like being told what to do.  We have a mind of our own and we can differentiate right from wrong.  I'm pretty sure that we can figure this out on our own. 

We have this perception that discipline restrains us, that it imposes boundaries on our life and our choices.  It can be those things, especially if it is coming from a higher authority, but it doesn't need to be.

Discipline can simplify our life.  It can enrich our life and our activity.

Three simple disciplines:
1. Refrain from harm.  Harming your neighbor, the stranger on the street or the spider on the wall.
2. Cultivate a wealth of good qualities.   Cultivate empathy and compassion.  Be generous, patient and kind.  Go for it, be an Artist.
3. Train your mind.  Develop focus, clarity and insight.  Recognize the natural stability of your mind and use it in your pursuit of happiness.

I am samsara.

Awake at night, caught up in this hell of ceaseless torment,
the endless machinations and ruminations of the mind,
I am like a boat without oars, strung along by a raging current,
subject to the whims of every crashing wave.
A miserable existence.

Like a hungry ghost in a barren desert,
the virtue of my mind has dried up and
no source of nourishment can be found.
Hopeless yet bound by craving,
I wander in and out of various mental states.
A miserable existence.

Like an animal, slaving after the aims of others,
I fulfill their requests but receive no gratitude.
I am expendable, replaceable.
My worth is measured out to me by by weight alone,
once I've carried my weight and they have had their lot,
they'll do with me as they please.
A miserable existence.

Like a human, I deserve to be recognized for my worth,
I have endured the hardship of my present circumstances,
in order to secure the benefit of my family and future.
I long to be free from this discontentment,
to be honored for my achievements with dignity,
to gain freedom and the peace of happiness.

Like a demigod, I'll fight for my position,
mine is the path of the virtuous and just,
Victory shall be mine and I will suffer no fools,
I will show you.

Like a god, procuring every advantage and truth
from the grand palace of my own position,
I am right.  I am right.

I am right.  As I wander off to sleep.

I am samsara, the cycle of existence.  Samsara is me.

Pray that I awake from this cycle of delusion and ignorance.

Gravity.

Gravity is very interesting.  We are all familiar with it, we learned how to operate within its bounds and even to use it to our advantage to do amazing things.

But what about the gravity of our decisions, actions and responsibilities?  Those have a lot of gravity, gravity that gives a lot of weight to our lives.  Weight that we often don't know how to deal with.

The interesting thing about gravity is that it always starts off with a fight and a fall.  We have to fight to get up.  We need to push and finagle and adapt.  We need to be persistent.  And then we fall.  The falling is inevitable really.  We may have succeeded in getting up but we still need to learn how to maintain that posture and even more so how to maintain it amidst movement and change.

But we persist.  The falling provides us with the tools to learn and we continue to examine and analyze until we succeed.  But the success doesn't stop there, once standing we move forward, we take steps and learn to hop and skip and roller skate and even fly.  We have actually learned to fly, even with gravity, not despite it.

So let's go back to the gravity of our decisions, actions and responsibilities.

Our initial reaction is to feel the heaviness of our situation.  We are often overwhelmed by the weight of our life, wishing that somehow it would all change and we could soar through the sky carefree and without any problems or conflict.  But it is important to realize that we are the weight.  That heaviness, it is us.  So we need to fight to pick ourselves up.  Or push ourselves up I suppose.

We will fall.

But recognize the problems and conflicts for what they are- learning opportunities.  Opportunities to adjust our posture.  Opportunities to find our balance.  Opportunities to make the right correction at the right time.

As we learn to stand with dignity and confidence, we can then learn to step forward with kindness and generosity.  As those develop momentum we can run with insight and develop the endurance it takes to accomplish great feats, great feats for ourselves and great feats for others.

We may even learn to fly.  Fly even amidst problems and conflict, amidst doubt and the impossibility of doing so because of the heaviness of our situation.  We learn to fly on the wings of skillful means and wisdom.  We can build those.

But first we need to learn to stand. 

Embodied.

I see a lot of weary and disheartened people.
I see a lot of disembodied people.

More than anything, I think people are looking for a sense of authentic presence in their lives.  They want to feel genuine, to feel that their life is full of meaning and purpose.

They want to be embodied.

But to be embodied, you need to know where you stand.  To trust your ground.

You need to know your values, to have integrity in what you do and dignity in who you are.

You need to have confidence, be brave enough to push past your fear and face your uncertainty.

You need to see through your faults and failures, drawing out the lessons and carrying on the wisdom.

You need to be willing to be vulnerable, to care without being callous and to give without expectation.

To be embodied is to embrace the qualities in you, to see the illusory nature of everything you are, were or will be, but to see that potentiality despite the illusions.

Its all right there, embrace it.