Mid-life breakthrough.

To have reached our destination,
to have traversed the path, accomplished our aims.
Just beyond where we are is where we want to be.

As such, we are divided amongst our self,
forever thirsting for things just beyond our reach.

Although we long to have gone beyond,
the journey to freedom takes place right in the middle of the path,
in the midst of our own life.

The mid-life struggle is the mid-life call to being present in the life you have created,
and to put aside your thirst and yearning for things beyond yourself.

We awaken in the middle of life to the way things are, not the way they could be. 

Wisdom lies just beyond the reach of fixation.

One of the fascinating aspects of understanding the Buddha's presentation of the mind is that confusion and wisdom are so closely connected, and often what separates us from experiencing one or the other is but a subtle shift in perspective. The Buddha taught that the primary negative emotions that we experience, called the five poisons, are all experienced as wisdom when we are free from grasping and fixation, otherwise called the five wisdoms.

Take jealousy for example. All of us experience jealousy, or the feeling that what we do isn't good enough or that others are somehow more talented or have better opportunities that we have. When we no longer fixate on our own inadequacy or ability, we can open ourselves up to experience the wisdom of innate fulfillment.

Arrogance is another common negative emotion. Arrogance holds tightly to our position, our view, our ideas or beliefs. Arrogance doesn't listen to what others have to say. When we relinquish these self-focused perspectives, we can give rise to the wisdom of equality, that all beings are equal and that all phenomena are equal in their nature.

Anger is experienced as a being averse to what is happening. When things aren't going our way, aren't meeting our expectations or are turning our the way we intended, we get angry. Anger is an attempt to maintain control or maintain power over a situation. When we let go of fixation, we can experience what is called mirror-like wisdom, where we respond and reflect what is happening. There is no distortion in a mirror, whatever you place in front of it is what it reflects back.

Desire or craving is a fixation on the particular qualities of characteristics of an object. We may be attached to a certain type of fashion, or brand, or person. The craving mind imputes so many characteristics onto the object that we cannot discern what is real from what is projected. When we are free from fixation, we experience the wisdom of discernment, which allows us to appreciate and acknowledge diverse qualities and characteristics but without the attendant forces of craving distorting our vision.

Lastly we come to confusion or ignorance. Ignorance fundamentally misconceives of who we are and the nature of the world around us. We think we are stuck as we are. We think the world around us is never going to improve. Everything seems rather inflexible and concrete. We we can break free from this type of fixation, we can experience with wisdom of the true nature, where we realize that everything is connected and interwoven.

We experience the five poisons regularly throughout our day. Wisdom lies just beyond, and the only thing holding us back is our own grasping and fixation. The Buddha's second noble truth is to let go of the origin, meaning to let go of these five poisons so that we can actualize and realize the state of cessation, our own true nature.

INSUFFICIENT DATA FOR MEANINGFUL EXPERIENCE

I watched an interesting TED talk the other day by David Eagleman about how we experience the world.  David and his team are doing breakthrough research for deaf people using technology to allow deaf people to actually hear.  It's pretty amazing stuff what they are doing.   

In his talk he mentions the German word umvelt, which means the surrounding world.  David argues that our experience is constrained by our sense perception and that the reality that we experience is defined by the limits of our sense organs.  He also talks about what would happen if we use technology to increase our sensory experience, such as being able to directly perceive UV light or infrared light.

Would that increase in sensory experience expand our umvelt?  Would it lead to a more expansive experience of the world?

Surely.  Without a doubt.

But how does that actually benefit us?

When I was in college, me and my roommate got in a heated discussion with one of his friends about the use of LSD or other psychoactive drugs.  The basis of his argument was that our brain is wired to only experience reality a certain way and by taking drugs you could expand that experience and presumably gain something in the experience.

Is it our experience of reality that limits us?

It is without a doubt in my mind that we could experience more, indefinitely so.  We could experience an expanded visual consciousness, a wider auditory consciousness, a more subtle olfactory and taste consciousness, and a much more discerning perception of touch.  We could do all of those things.

All of this is based on the assumption that we have insufficient data or information, and that insufficiency limits us.  It limits our experience and our experience equals...what does more experience equal?

More experience could equal more humility, more awe and insight.  I think that is really the hope.  But truly, more experience usually equals more ego.  What if we could become like the gods and know all?  How marvelous would we be?  Our amazing experience would mean that we are amazing.  The significance of everything that we experience would translate to our lives being significantly significant.  We would find our lives meaningful.  Having experienced EVERYTHING, our lives would be fulfilled.  Maybe we would even finally feel satiated.

What really limits our experience is that we crave experience for our own sake.  Then we fixate on that experience of reality as true, having experienced it ourselves.

Craving and ignorance, those are our real inadequacies.

Craving keeps us in a cycle of consumption.  Ignorance fixates on me and mine.  Neither are fulfilling.  Both constrict our experience.